I don't mind the rat race but I could do with a little more cheese.

Phase one of braces installation was pretty traumatic to be perfectly honest. The spacers the orthodontist inserted around my six year molars on Friday did not successfully create enough space around those four teeth to allow for easy insertion of the anchor bands. He and the assistant managed to get two bands on, but they weren't sitting straight and the other two teeth were simply too close to their neighbor teeth to get the bands on. They gave me a couple of breathers during this phase so I could catch my breath, let my heart rate return to normal, and stop squirming in pain.

The ortho decided to remove the ill-fitting bands and insert new spacers around my molars and he'll put the bands on in a few weeks. The assistant was able to apply the ceramic brackets to the rest of my teeth and snap the wires in to connect all the brackets. That phase was blessedly pain free and I nearly dozed off a few times despite the retractor and tongue stick keeping my mouth parts in the correct position.

I felt really good when I left the office thanks to the adrenaline/endorphin high from phase one of the process. I did a little shopping on the way home and even logged back on to my work computer to try and catch up on my portion of data gathering for our budget plan.

Just before 4pm, I changed into bike clothes and took off for the Worldgate Center in Herndon for what I thought would be my last Jenny Craig consultation. I'd mapped out the route and it was only four miles. Less than the ride to work! I could totally do that. I didn't count on the 90 degrees and high humidity, though. Oof. But I made it, in less than record time, and impressed the heck out of my consultant. I also called Hubbyfink and asked him to please come rescue me because I wasn't up to the ride back home.

The consultation was good. She understood my desire to no longer purchase the food and stated that there's no magic fairy dust in the food. Making my own food choices and planning my own meals was the goal of the program anyway; I just decided to go there faster than we normally would have. And since I dropped 3.5 pounds in the past week when I haven't lost any weight since early May shows that I'm doing something right. She also explained that I've already paid for a year of consultation and she wanted me to continue to come in and talk about how things are going with my weight and health. I agreed to do that, especially since she wasn't going to push the food angle.

Back to the braces. Today, I'm not so happy with my decision. The insides of my mouth hurt and my teeth are tender. I have to figure out a new way to smile since the brackets are pushing my lips out and everything feels weird. I've sent my mom a photo, but I'm really not comfortable with having my picture taken right now. I feel so ugly. I keep reminding myself that in less than two years, and just before my 40th birthday, I will have perfect teeth to go with my new and improved figure. It will all be worth it. Boy, could I be any more pollyanna?

The abrasions on my elbows are nearly gone and the only remaining soreness is on the right side of my jaw. I guess my bike helmet straps pulled my jaw a bit. I have a new helmet and Hubbyfink is checking the local bike shops for a replacement wheel. Provided all goes as planned, I'll be on my bike Sunday and commuting by bike on Monday. I'm definitely looking forward to that.

Enjoyed a fun choir practice last night. Two newcomers to the SCA joined our ranks as a bass and alto. Yay, another alto! They got tossed into the deep end of the pool, musically speaking, but were able to tread along and not get scared off.

My weight loss has stagnated again, but considering the lack of exercise this weekend and the comfort food ingested, I'm going to count maintaining as a win. My consultant is pretty brilliant at finding ideas to motivate me. I have to motivate myself as well. I feel awesome now and look pretty good, too. It's hard to see beyond what's happening now to think that I could feel and look even better.

I'm getting pretty excited about Pennsic. I haven't looked at the class listing yet so I can make my carefully color coded schedule which will be ignored during the event. I plan on working at Troll most of the time and relaxing the other part of the time. I'm looking forward to hanging out with my friends. I'm not going to say that I hope it's not too hot or too wet because it will be regardless. I need to take in some dresses and smocks so I have something to wear.

My weight loss has been fairly stagnant for the past month and has been very slow since the beginning of December. I've been trudging on with occasional frequent lapses of good judgment and discipline. I've been adding lots of snacks to combat cravings and eating way more calories in stuff I didn't really want when I should have just eaten the damn cookie cheese dip and then gotten back on path. I've also been second-guessing myself a lot. There are countless studies out there saying that the majority of people who lose weight are going to put it right back on plus more and those people would have been better off not going through a weight loss in the first place because of the wear and tear the down and up put on the body. Of course there are studies saying that if one is obese, one is going to drop dead of anything from diabetes to heart attack to snail fever* at any moment.

( This got longer than expected. )

I'm no fan of Daylight Saving Time but it was awfully nice to be able to walk my neighborhood loop after work and well before the sun went down. I was showered and in my jammies before full dark, even. That was nice, if a bit odd. I spent the rest of the evening organizing my cosmetics, cleaning my make-up brushes, and yelling at Shangela on "RuPaul's Drag Race". That smirk of hers drives me up the freaking wall.

In fashion and body modification news, I am officially in size 16 slacks. Apparently, my jeans are a little more forgiving because I've been wearing 16 jeans since January, I think. But I donned a pair of 18 slacks this morning and they were WAY too baggy. Slipped on the 16 slacks and they fit like a glove. Bam! I'm so grateful to have had my consultant with me through the depth of winter when I felt like giving up again and again. I'm so happy and proud of myself. I still have a long way to go, but I can definitely see how far (four pants sizes!) I've come.

I have been on the Jenny Craig program for twenty-five weeks. In that time, I have lost 31.5 pounds and 19 inches. I'm the smallest I've been since Hubbyfink and I have been together. I have energy and good health and a waist. I'm so happy. I'm also only 16.5 pounds* away from the halfway point of my weight loss journey.

( A few extra details. )
I am psyched and pumped and so incredibly motivated.

-------
*D'oh! I miscounted on my facebook brag post.

It's been a week of hard work, mindful eating, and healthful choices and it has paid off. I gained four pounds between Christmas and Epiphany and I lost over three pounds this past week.

*Kermit flail*

My small goal is to hit thirty pounds lost by the end of January. I am 3.2 pounds away from that goal. Totally doable.

Totally.

The days are racing past and I'm trying to keep up. I've been spending a lot of time in my own head -- what else is new? --and continuing to focus on self-improvement. I feel like I post the same thing over and over again: excited about basement remodel, doing well with the walking, started strength-training, continuing to eat nutritious and balanced meals, continuing to lose weight and inches. That's what I'm focusing on now. And aside from the basement remodel, all of the above takes a fair amount of my attention. The basement remodel doesn't take much attention because it hasn't started yet.

I think about food all the freaking time. I feel daunted by the goal I've set before me. My consultant is a great cheerleader and reality checker. While she was never as heavy as I am, she was a larger person before she used this program and she understands the pitfalls that lie along the journey. I'm so grateful for her and for my other friends being supportive and cheering me on. When I feel pouty that I can't won't gorge on sugary or salty snacks, I remember all the people who are inspired by what I'm doing and who are rooting for me to reach -- and maintain -- my goal.

Marianne, my consultant, gave me a sobering thought this morning. She told me about a client who reached her goal weight a few years ago. This woman still comes in for occasional maintenance meetings and told Marianne that she mourns her "old life" where she could pig out on anything. I think about that a lot because I know that this has to be life change in order for my goal to stick. I can't get to my goal and then go back to old habits. The whole endeavor would be pointless. And there's a tiny part of me that misses going to Pablo's any time I want. On the other hand, the rest of me realizes that dining out should be a treat, not the norm. And the last time I dined at Pablo's (two Fridays ago), I ate moderately and did not leave the restaurant wanting to die because I'd ingested WAY too much food. The mental shift is happening and it's working. I can lead a so-called normal life and be the size and shape I want to be.

I am so proud of myself. I worked HARD during my vacation keeping close to my Jenny Plan and working out daily. It paid off: I lost four pounds over the past two weeks. RAWR! I was so energized by the news that I packed my gym bag when I got home to transfer Jennyfood to the freezer. I am hitting the treadmill after work, yessiree.

So. Yesterday was hard. Actually, most of this past week has been hard. I've been on an emotional roller coaster and feeling like I was floundering along. Yesterday, I was so low, I wanted lots of fried chicken and doughnuts. That would make me happy and fill the empty hole inside. I even whined to Hubbyfink when I got home that I wanted fried chicken and a doughnut. And then I trudged upstairs and donned my workout clothes. I sweated through a grueling twenty minutes of lunges and "volleyball" and curls and jogging in place. My chicken fettuccine was good, but it was no fried chicken. The cheesecake was good, but it was no doughnut.

I weighed in this morning and learned that I have lost nine pounds in the past three weeks. You know, I don't want that fried chicken or the doughnut quite so much anymore.

I "survived" Courtney's Slumber Party last night. Ate lunch fairly late, loaded up on water, noshed on fruits and veggies only, and sat myself as far away from the snack table as possible. Easy peasy. I was happy to talk with her and others about the Jenny Craig system. She has all sorts of tips and tricks which I'm not quite ready to use since I'm only on week two, but they'll be valuable in a month or so. I was also surprised to learn that she'd lost all her weight in nine months. WOW. She stressed that she worked HARD and exercised every day. I can totally do that. My current goal is to lose 66 pounds, but I really want to lose 100. That is totally doable.