I don't mind the rat race but I could do with a little more cheese.

After our stint with Mr. Campbell, PG and I wandered vendor floor and artist alleys. I accosted and was accosted by lots of fellow Adventure Time cosplayers. It was GREAT being the only Flame Princess in attendance, rather than one of several Fionnas, if I may say so. Here are some of my favorite shots:

( What time is it?? )

PG and I continued wandering the floor until it was time to queue up for a photo with Ron Perlman. The photo below is actually our second photo with Mr. Perlman, who was concerned that I'd been eating too many carrots. I saw the photographer push the button aaaaaand I blinked. I knew that I had blinked as the shutter ...shuttered... and figured that oh, well, I'll have a photo with Ron Perlman where my eyes are closed. But nope. Those kind photography folks grabbed us before we rounded the area to nab our picture and hauled us back into line for a redo. I felt so bad about wasting everybody's time because of my goof, but they were all so sweet about it, and Mr Perlman grabbed Charlene and me tightly and told us "Come on in closer, ladies." Check out the size of his mitts. His hand is as big as my rib cage! And he's a total sweetheart. Absolute doll. That is my DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES BLINK smile, by the way.

( Don't blink. Don't even blink. )

It was way past time for lunch and as we set off in search for sustenance, I crossed paths with the female half of the cosplay panel from Friday night. She gushed over my costume and said, "You've signed up for the costume contest, yes?" I hemmed and hawed. She repeated, "You've signed up for the costume contest, YES??" Um, not yet, but I will! Pleased with that answer, she let us continue our quest for food.

PG and I retired to our room for a rest after lunch and I fretted and fumbled a bit and finally decided that YES, I would sign up for the costume contest. With that decision made, I reworked my wig a bit so it wouldn't pull so hard on my hair while PG changed out of Elle and into "Generic Princess".

( Generic Princess gets friendly with Peppermint Butler )

We shopped, took lots more pictures and had lots of photos taken of us, and crossed paths with the female half of the cosplay panel who again asked if I'd signed up for the contest. D'oh! I hadn't, and time was running out. Thankfully, the cap hadn't been met and I was added to the list. Now the stage fright kicked in, heh.

The wait for the contest to start burned off most of that fright, though. It took forEVER for things to get underway, and I was #107 in the queue. Oof. There were some cool (and pretty) people in line around me, though, and we made our own fun.

( So pretty. )

Walking onto the stage wasn't nearly as frightening as I'd thought it might be. In fact, when the MC announced, "From 'Adventure Time', it's FLAME PRINCESS!" the crowd went WILD. I wasn't sure what I'd do when I hit the marks on the stage, but I couldn't help but beam when I hit the mark at the center of the stage and held up my little fiery purse for everyone to see. The panelist who pressed me so hard to enter was one of the judges and stopped me to ask questions about my cosplay history and the costume. That was pretty cool of her to do, I thought.

( I love this photo. )

I didn't win -- the superheroes/villains and Space Marine took the honors -- but it was a total blast being in the contest. I'm definitely doing that again! PG told me afterwards that she had heard lots of chatter from people being excited about the Flame Princess wandering around. Hee! We then snagged a VERY late dinner and I called dibs on the shower as soon as we got back to our room because if I had to spend one more minute in that make-up (it was going on twelve hours at that point), I was going to go mad.

Sunday was pretty quiet and we both wore civvies, nerdy civvies to be sure, but not costumes. I did my hardcore shopping and enabling PG to spend more money than she was comfortable with (heh heh). The ride home was pretty quick and uneventful, mostly because I passed out from sheer exhaustion and left the driving to PG. We both can't wait for the next con!

I keep wanting to write here on LJ, but all that comes out of my fingertips are giddy burbles about how happy I am. What a problem to have, eh?

Life is so good right now. Even when it's not sunshine and roses, it's still good. I've been working on making my needs and feelings clear even when they seem stupid or irrational or too needy. We've finally gotten past the point where I am surprised by how receptive the beau is when I bring up these uncomfortable-to-me topics. This isn't to say that he agrees with everything I propose, but he gives me the courtesy of listening and then presents his point of view so that we're both on the same page. I appreciate that he doesn't play games, and I can believe in his dedication and dependability.

That all sounds so clinical, but it's a revelation to have a transparent relationship. And it doesn't hurt either that we're both completely mad about each other.

In early June, the beau and I trekked out to a photographer friend’s home for a few hours of goofing around in front of the camera. We had a blast unleashing our inner post-apocalyptic teenagers.

( WHAT TIME IS IT?? )

( This is what 40 year old goofballs look like. )

( I can barely refrain from making “self love” jokes since Finn and Fionna are essentially the same character… However, I do adore this picture of us. )

(Indoor photo by Chip York Photography and outdoor photos by Monika Townsend. Jake & Cake plushies by XOFifi.)

And because I’m so proud of it, I have to share a few photos of the sword I (okay, we) made for my Fionna cosplay. It started as a sketch on a piece of cardboard so that the beau had the appropriate shape and dimensions. He drew the individual pieces on another piece of cardboard and cut them out. I assembled the parts with layers of masking tape.

( From cardboard... )

He glued in a stabilizing dowel and I taped everything up. He then hit the sword with a few coats of primer. I used six different shades of pink on the planes and edges and five coats of spray gloss to make the sword look crystalline. Et voila!

( ...to crystalline sword. )

As this was the first non-fabric accessory I’ve made, I don’t think I could have done so well without the beau’s expertise and guidance. We made a good team and I’ve got all sorts of warm fuzzies about the props we’ll be making for future cons and next year’s Steampunk World’s Fair.

This bad boy took about ten hours of construction. I started with a plain straw hat from Michael's Arts & Crafts and, using this tutorial as a jumping off place, I covered the crown, outer brim, and inner brim with cotton fabric left over from a waistcoat I'd made for my beau. I covered the joints around the base of the crown and just under the brim with braided gimp. I then sewed one side of the brim to the crown, hiding the stitches in the gimp.

That was an absolute pain in the keister, let me just say. There was SO MUCH dried glue that I had to sew through. I needed a thimble to push the needle in and then small pliers to pull the needle out on the other side.

Eventually, I felt that the connection was secure and moved on to lining the inside of the crown with scraps of black linen. I covered the transition join between linen and cotton with another length of gimp. At this point, I'd been working on the hat for about four hours and was too pooped to continue. ( Feathers would wait until the next evening. )

Ten years and nearly five hours ago, I married a man I thought was the great love of my life. And it is true that we were in love, for a time, anyway. Enough that I thought we could weather what life threw at us. As time passed, however, we grew at much different rates and our differences became greater than our similarities. Our respective values became harder and harder to reconcile. It took several more years for me to realize that I couldn't live with that spouse for another thirty years. My innermost me was all but snuffed out and, with my being so practiced at willful ignorance/obliviousness/stubbornness, I wouldn't let myself acknowledge that fact until a year ago.

Ten days ago, a judge in Fairfax County, Virginia, signed my petition for divorce. I didn't find out for sure until last Friday when my lawyer's paralegal emailed with confirmation from the clerk. The vicious part of me really wanted for the divorce to be signed and entered on 1 May 2014 for symmetry's sake. And while numbers are silly constructs, that vicious side is satisfied with "ten days before the tenth anniversary." The gentle side, though, found an unexpected landmine in the wee small hours of the morning and I had a little cry. I poked at my feelings, trying to figure out what was going on. I don't think I was mourning or regretting... Maybe it was merely the last of the milestones.

I am happy that the tumult of this particular life experience is behind me. I am happy that it wasn't excessively bitter or ugly. I am happy that my innermost me survived to not only fight another day but to thrive. I am happy to have had the love and kindness of friends and my family to help steady me along the way. I am happy to have the love and friendship of someone whose path crossed mine at the end of last year and who I hope will be able to keep pace with me for a while yet. And now that I no longer feel like I have to keep secrets, I am really and truly happy.

Goodness gracious. The last time I posted was in October? Well, let's get caught up on the highlights shall we?

• I traded in my 2012 Beetle for a 2013 Beetle convertible in October. It's almost the same car (and package, warranty, etc) except that it is a year newer, has leather interior, and is a soft-top convertible. I drove it with the top down for the first week I owned it (after which point, rain moved in to town and I was forced to leave the top up). There are times when I miss the better aesthetic of the hardtop (and the trunk space!), but come the warm weather months I will be in heaven scooting around in my little dream car.
  
• I spent a fantastic week at my aunt's North Carolina cabin for Thanksgiving where we had eleven adults, five children, five dogs, a cat, and a hamster. We got about an inch of snow the Wednesday before Thanksgiving and it was absolutely magical. We played lots of games, ate lots of food, drank a lot of booze, and shared a lot of love. It was exactly the Thanksgiving holiday I wanted and needed.
  
• I traveled to Memphis for Christmas with my family. I'd fretted and agonized over what to do for Christmas since that's such a family-oriented holiday and isn't terribly conducive for taking in "orphans". Mom's birthday gift to me was airfare to come home. My nine day visit was the absolute perfect amount of time and I got to do almost everything that I wanted to do from spending a day with my father's family to seeing my bestie Scott multiple days to seeing old friends from high school a couple of times and, of course, spending lots and lots of quality time with my family. I even participated in a 4k fun run/walk through the Starry Nights light show with my brother David and his wife Melinda on my last night in town.
  
• I rang in the New Year at Courtney & Kevin's with a small group of friends. We played Cards Against Humanity for hours, gabbed about steampunky/pseudo-Victorian things, and turned on the tube just in time to see the ball drop. I received a wonderful New Year's kiss.
  
  Looking ahead, I'm ready to get the basement cleaned out and made a habitable space as it's been languishing in disrepair for far too long (four years as of last September, to be exact). After I evict all the left-behind trash down there, I shall patch the ceiling and walls, slap paint on those walls, get some carpet installed, and call it a useful room. Mom thinks I should move my craft supplies down there and make it my new craft room. I think it would make a lovely workout space. There's no reason I couldn't do both, to be honest. Oh, and a place to put the bikes that isn't the dining room (although, hauling that 50 pound loop-frame bike up and down the stairs is less than pleasant...) So many possibilities there.
  
  I've registered for the Steampunk World's Fair in NJ in May and am pretty pumped. I'm tagging along with Court and Kevin and a couple other friends who are mostly dropping out of the SCA and are focusing on neo-Vic costuming. I do hope that other events will pop up between now and then because I've acquired a lovely wardrobe and am eager to put it to use.
  
  That's all I can share for now as I should gently ease back into journaling, heh.

This happened:


Things got a little out of hand with the hair dye on the 1st of October. And then they stayed completely in hand during the touch up on the 11th. It's amazing how the right tools and a little bit of experience make a process go so much more smoothly.

I've been seeing a counselor to help me Figure out who I am and learn how to recognize and work around a lifetime of faulty coping mechanisms, etc. Today we bounced ALL OVER the place as I told her about the reading I'd done about relationships while at the lakehouse as well as a few anecdotes of recent conversations with friends which have shown me how I should react rather than how I have been reacting.

We'll hand wave that whole "should" thing for the time being.

( It turns out that my friends have been teaching me valuable lessons along the way which I didn't notice until my counselor pointed them out. )

Where do I go from here? Well, more work with the counselor to be sure. I want to be as healthy -- physically and mentally -- as I possibly can and be a better friend to both those people in my life as well as myself.

Famous last words, heh.

The weather was GLORIOUS on Saturday and I couldn't in good conscience stay indoors or merely get a mani-pedi so I grabbed my trust Lily bike and took off for the trails. Because the sun beat down pretty mercilessly -- despite the cool temps -- I chose to head east on the W&OD trail which has more tree cover. As I approached the Sugarland Run Trail exit, I decided to change my plan and explore that particular set of trails.

The one and only time I've been through that area was when Scott and I explored during a fair day last December (or was it January?). Except for where I had to cross Elden Street, the trail area is completely wooded but not a close wood which would be stifling. The trees are tall and thin and the breeze coming through was lovely. Not much in the way of wildlife beyond squirrels. I overtook one jogger and passed another jogger and two cyclists in the secluded woodland (which is in the heart of Herndon, VA).

The trail system isn't well-marked and I wound up taking lots of off-shoot trails into neighborhoods which meant I had to retrace my path to get back on the route. Due to the trees, lots of areas of the trail are littered with leaves. It was in one of these areas that my adventure came to a much more exciting and painful conclusion.

A carpet of leaves hid broken pavement and I hit my brakes too hard as I lost control. I went over the handlebar and landed on the right side of my face and body. The bike then landed on me. It took a few moments for the initial shock to abate and then I wrestled my bike off me. I lifted my head and noticed ( some gruesomeness. )

I phoned a few friends and finally found someone at home. hannnahkl was my savior. I pushed my bike about three-quarters of a mile out of the trail system to get to an actual street where she picked me up and rushed me over to Reston Hospital's ER. That stay took about three hours, I think? I got a CT which seems to be pretty standard after a bike crash and because the doctor worried I might have fractured my right cheek/orbital or jaw and x-rays of my right shoulder, ribs, right pinkie, and right knee which are all places with significant road rash/torn skin and where I winced when the doctor poked me.

Happily, nothing on me was me was broken and my chin required twelve stitches. As of Saturday night, the swelling started. My right knee looks like I have two patellae and my right cheek is HYOOGE. As of this morning, my chin is swollen into my neck and my right cheek was starting to bruise. I'm going to have SPECTACULAR bruising as the scrapes fade. The stitches should dissolve in a week or so and the doctor thinks the resulting scar will fade in a year or so.

I'm leaving my bike dismantled for a while (had to take the front wheel off to get it in hannnahkl's car) so I won't be tempted to ride before I'm healed and before my bike shop can check her out to make sure she's not broken. I'm very sore, dull surprise, but will live to ride again.

My four month surge-versary was Monday and things are going pretty swimmingly. I've been in a stall for a few weeks now, but my surgeon doesn't want me worry about it. In fact, when I said that I should hide the scale, he said I should throw it out the window. I panicked that I've lost my 60% of weight (which is the average for gastric bypass), but he assures me that I have another fourteen months to go. Yes, the loss will slow, but it will continue.

I really should have taken measurements at the start so I could see *that* change.

As mentioned elseweb, during my check-up yesterday, my surgeon asked if I watch "True Blood". When I said yes, he replied that I'm starting to look like Sookie. Heh. I think the only things Anna Paquin and I have in common are our blonde hair, dark brown eyes, and funny noses, but I'll take the compliment.

In related news, I have FINALLY organized the HUMONGOUS pile of too big clothing which have been languishing in the craft room. ( The pile was huge. )

Sooo... I think I'll host a "come take my gently used clothes" day in the near future. Maybe 10 Aug? (reedrover come on over any time after work if you don't want to traipse up here on a Saturday. I'm free every evening but the 6th.)

My stamina is improving with the assistance of extra protein. I'm able to ride my bike about six miles before I need to break for half a cheese stick or a few swigs of a protein shake. Last night's ride was juuust shy of eleven miles and I was pretty weak and shivery by the time I got home. Happily, bounced back pretty quickly and am looking forward to getting back on the bike (if the storms hold off) or my toning video (if they don't).